Them - the unwanted.

I didn’t think it’s so hard for women these days to get married. Recently I met up with a few of my foreign female friends. We met up and chatted over so many things and one of the things we talked about was marriage. Meetups and chats with these friends have coincidentally made me realize one thing; that so many women outside Singapore have boyfriends who are unwilling to marry them. It is sad and I am utterly sorry to those girls. Yet this phenomenon has nevertheless bring about two points that I thought was real; firstly, women anywhere and everywhere actually do have the desire to get married. And this is despite their profession, level of education, modernization as well as the current gender ideology that categorizes women who choose not to get married as smart women (when I thought women who choose not to get married don‘t even have a choice to start with, but this is definitely a separate issue). Secondly, I realized that men are after all the species, with few exceptions of course, that hold the position to make big decisions such as who to get married to and what not. And this is despite some arguments made by some feminists about the lack of difference between the role of men to that of modern women. So anyway, to my unfortunate girl friends whose boyfriends aren’t interested in marrying them, I wish them the very best of luck. As for me, those chats and meetups have certainly brought about something for me to ponder. Honestly though, I am not sure if I am ‘that’ lucky just because my boyfriend married me. Somehow it isn’t a big thing to me as marriage is exactly what I had wanted out of my relationship. Also, the situation isn’t really an issue here with women in this country. Most Singaporean women I know are somehow still wanted as wife by their boyfriend. So I don’t know why such situation happened to girls outside Singapore. But I guess after hearing those news, I do feel somewhat proud of myself for being married. Especially if it means that not only does it show that I can keep my man in the relationship, but also I made him happily marry me.

Thank God for all the good stuff He’s given me.